The start of the 30th season of Survivor
necessitates a pivotal pop culture analysis as we are also in the midst of the
30th season of The Real World, and (true story) there have also been
30 Wrestlemanias.
It’s time for the Ultimate Triple Threat Match. Judging such a spectacle would require
someone with demonstrated immersion in all three events. Say, someone who had ranked
every Wrestlemania match.
And even ranked
every Survivor winner.
I’m willing to answer my country’s call. I love
my country, no matter what any former New York mayor might say (I’m looking at
you, Dinkins). If I don’t analyze 30 years of lowbrow popular culture, the
terrorists win.
Wrestlemania vs. Real World vs. Survivor – let’s go year by
year to see which (Roman) reigns supreme.
(points are awarded in the inverse of the rank…you’ll figure
it out)
One.
1.
Survivor Borneo (Spring, 2000) 3 pts
2.
RW New York (Summer, 1992) 2 pts
3.
Wrestlemania (1985) 1 pt
This is a hotly competitive race for the top spot; the first
Real World had a jagged quality that would quickly become hard to locate in the
reality genre. When Julie and Kevin
fought about race on the street it seemed (maybe in the early 90s “These Are
Days” sort of way) to be less about product placement or badly paid writers
generating storylines and instead just two people trying to work through a
difference on an important issue. Survivor
wins though; 125 million people watched at least some portion of its finale,
the Tagi alliance set the template for the way reality competition would be
played, and Richard Hatch was a more nuanced and compelling heel than Roddy
Piper. It’s a qualitative estimation
that sinks Mania (it was also only a closed circuit product, just touching
significantly less of the culture) as a ranking of the all time Survivors or
Real Worlds would still have their first endeavor high on the list, and no one
would say that Wrestlemania was a particularly good show despite (more because
of) a main event appearance by Mr. T. Here’s how popular Survivor was, Colleen
finished 6th and got the female lead in a studio comedy. Here’s how popular Survivor was, when the GOP
nominee for President George W Bush went on Regis’s show, his guest co-host
that day was 4th place finisher Sue Hawk, notable for her speech at final
tribal council. This year’s 4th
place finisher will not be interviewing Jeb with Kelly Ripa.
Two.
1.
Survivor Australia (Spring, 2001) 3 pts (6)
2.
RW Los Angeles (Summer, 1993) 2 pts (4)
3.
Wrestlemania II (1986) 1 pt (2)
Same order in the second season; Real World brings us Tami,
getting her jaw wired shut to lose weight, having an abortion, having David kicked
out of the house (“It wasn’t not funny!”) to create a reality TV trope; she’s
the standout character of this group even before marrying/unmarrying Kenny
Anderson. The rest of the cast can’t
carry that weight; however, and Australia gave us Michael Skupin burning off
his skin, All American Colby and the (for its time) devilish Jerri. We had an
older woman (Tina) as the winner and a younger woman, Elizabeth not yet
Hasselbeck, who would eventually spend years misleading the gullible and the
infirmed. Mania’s pretty bad, this year,
bad in three separate cities. You could
comfortably never see either of the first two Manias as even the biggest
wrestling junkie.
Three.
1.
RW San Francisco (Summer, 1994) 3 pts (7)
2.
Wrestlemania III (1987) 2 pts (4)
3.
Survivor Africa (Winter, 2001-02) 1 pt (7)
This is a hard vote against Wrestlemania III, which
contained both one of the biggest matches in its history (Hulk Hogan v. Andre
the Giant) and one of its best (Randy Savage v. Ricky Steamboat), but San
Francisco, probably to this date, is the best of all Real World seasons (Puck
v. Pedro would have been a 4 ½ star match). Rachel, 20 years later, remains in
television as a right wing talking head (married to a future Real Worlder,
Congressman Sean, who believes vaccines are fascist) and Judd and Pam turned
their flirtation into their own Real World marriage. Survivor’s good, with Ethan, Lex, and Tom –
but not comparable to the rest of this field.
Four.
1.
Wrestlemania IV (1988) 3 pts (7)
2.
Survivor Marquesas (Spring, 2002) 2 pts (9)
3.
RW London (Summer, 1995) 1 pt (8)
This is a bad matchup; pretty easily the worst efforts from
both Survivor and Real World to that date and a fairly uninspiring Wrestlemania
as well. Mania has a tournament to crown
a new champion, and its winner (Savage) was significantly more credible than
Survivor’s (Vecepia) in a season where that show introduced a purple rock to
screwjob Paschal out of the game. Real
World was drab; Neil getting his tongue bitten off the high point (well, not for
him) of a season that included a pre-Human Stain Jacinda Barrett.
Five
1.
Wrestlemania V (1989) 3 pts (10)
2.
RW Miami (Summer, 1996) 2 pts (10)
3.
Survivor Thailand (Fall, 2002) 1 pt (10)
Five years in and we have a three way tie in this three way
dance. Middling efforts all around;
Mania (in its second straight year at Trump Plaza, which feels as sad as you’d
imagine but the slots are as loose as Hogan’s punches) features a well built
and worked Hogan v. Savage main effort (the Mega Powers Exploded because Hogan’s
eyes lusted Elizabeth), Miami ups the RW sex quotient with a shower threesome;
and Survivor’s winner (Brian Heidik) was a terrific player with all the charm
of a CSI villain of the week. There
aren’t many elements in wrestling more satisfying than a good, long build for a
main event that actually pays off in the ring – and Mania was able to do that this
year.
Six
1.
Survivor Amazon (Spring, 2003) 3 pts (13)
2.
RW Boston (Summer, 1997) 2 pts (12)
3.
Wrestlemania VI (1990) 1 pt (11)
Tight here, solid efforts all around; Amazon introduced us
to Rob Cesternino, who brought a level of craftsmanship not yet seen in the
game; he overshadowed eventual winner Jenna (who would later marry/divorce
prior winner Ethan, and would eventually…”compete” is not reflective of her
performance…let’s go with attend a wrestling match in which she was a listed
competitor) and her best pal Heidi (now married to MLB pitcher Cole Hamels)
despite their removing clothing for peanut butter, as stunt they turned into a
big Playboy payday. Boston was fun,
Syrus was probably the first Real Worlder to effectively use the “hey, come back
and see the house” strategy to bang locals, Montana drank at the daycare
center, Sean kept quiet his lack of belief in evolution and desire to destroy
the American working class. Mania was
in Toronto and featured an apparent torch passing from Hogan to the Ultimate
Warrior, the only match out of the 14(!!!) on the card to get even 12 minutes.
Seven
1.
RW Seattle (Summer, 1998) 3 pts (15)
2.
Survivor Pearl Islands (Fall, 2003) 2 pts (15)
3.
Wrestlemania VII (1991) 1 pt (12)
Real World pulls an upset here; Pearl Islands had breakout
characters Rupert and (future wrestling manager) Johnny Fairplay (RIP to his
grandmother) but Seattle is an all time great Real World season. Irene gets slapped (by Stephen, who was, in
fact, a homosexual); Boston David starts sleeping with someone in production
and breaks down in a car (I love you Kira!!) Linsdsay and Janet are just the right amount
of too cool for school. Boston Rob and
Amber showmance their way to the All-Stars finale and then spin through multiple incarnations as a low level celebrity couple. Mania has a really good Savage/Warrior match
with Randy reuniting with Miss Elizabeth at its conclusion but the pro-War
cheerleading of the main event angle just brought down the event below the
level of the other two. Much like the
snubbing of American Sniper at the Oscars, Fox News should take the third place
finish of Mania VII as a sign of leftist perniciousness.
Eight
1.
Wrestlemania VIII (1992) 3 pts (15)
2.
Survivor All Stars (Spring, 2004) 2 pts (17)
3.
RW Hawaii (Summer, 1999) 1 pt (16)
An easy Mania win; it’s the first Mania with two four star
matches (Savage v. Ric Flair and Bret Hart v. Roddy Piper) and that overcomes a
particularly bad main event (Hogan v. Sid, father of a future Big Brother
competitor…don’t get me started on Big Brother). Here, Mania overcomes a Real World carried by
Ruthie’s alcoholism, Teck Money’s charisma, and Amaya’s lack of self esteem; I
liked grumpy Survivor All-Stars, with entitled veterans who wanted to position
themselves as larger than the game (that’s become another reality trope – watch
the live feeds of an episode of Big Brother when a returning player decides to
refer to production by their first names…I told you not to get me started, this
is your fault.)
Nine
1.
RW New Orleans (Summer, 2000) 3 pts (19)
2.
Survivor Vanuatu (Spring, 2005) 2 pts (19)
3.
Wrestlemania IX (1993) 1 pt (16)
Come on be my baby tonight.
Come on be my baby tonight.
Well I've seen the way you treated other thugs you've been
with,
Come on, be my baby tonight.
Survivor has a collection of interesting women (Scout,
Twila, Eliza) and a worthy winner (Chris Daugherty); Mania has Jim Ross in a
toga, but they both fall to David’s sweet, sweet tunes from N’Awlins. The only better song to come out of a reality show is Miss Lawrence's Closet Freak.
Ten
1.
Wrestlemania X (1994) 3 pts (19)
2.
Real World Back to New York (Summer, 2001) 2 pts
(21)
3.
Survivor Palau (Spring, 2005) 1 pt (20)
Ten seasons in – it’s Real World out in front. Both Mania
and Real World return to New York in their anniversary seasons; it is entirely
possible that, as of this date, the two best Wrestlemania matches ever (Bret
Hart v Owen Hart, Shawn Michaels v. Razor Ramon, both 5 star classics that
advanced the form like the invention of movable type) are here as WWF makes a
turn away from Hulk Hogan to a more athletic style of wrestling. Survivor has Stephanie, battling from
underneath like Katniss; Real World introduces us to Coral and her foil, wrestling wannabe Mike,
who, at present, is the Miz, now a WWE veteran.
Eleven
1.
Real World: Chicago (Spring, 2002) 3 pts (24)
2.
Wrestlemania XI (1995) 2 pts (21)
3.
Survivor: Guatemala (Fall, 2005) 1 pt (21)
A down year all the way around, Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel
helps elevate a card whose main event featured Lawrence Taylor; future MTV
Challenge cornerstones Aneesa and Tonya joined Cara in carrying Chicago to a
narrow win during a season in which the Housemates lived through 9-11. Survivor
added a hidden immunity idol that is a significantly less welcome gimmick than
the ladder used in that Michaels/Razor match from Mania X.
Twelve
1.
Real World Las Vegas (Winter, 2002-03) 3 pts
(27)
2.
Wrestlemania XII (1996) 2 pts (23)
3.
Survivor Panama (Spring, 2006) 1 pt (22)
Here’s how competitive this year is; Survivor introduces us
to Cirie, like Curt Hennig, one of the best never to win the belt; Mania’s
got one of its all time great matches, 60 minutes between Bret Hart and Shawn
Michaels, but Vegas is the year Real World entered its attitude era, embracing
train wreck TV and setting the template for the genre as did it 11 seasons previous. Brynn and (future Hulk Hogan
trainee) Trishelle were a little broken and desperate for fame; it was
claustrophobic and riveting. This will
be controversial as the body of collective wisdom sees this as the year RW
became too trashy (as if such a thing exists) and prefigured the state of
reality to come.
Thirteen
1.
Survivor Cook Islands (Fall, 2006) 3 pts (25)
2.
Wrestlemania XIII (1997) 2 pts (25)
3.
Real World Paris (Summer, 2003) 1 pt (28)
A strong Survivor; there might not be a better Survivor
player (both tactically and aesthetically, although it’s really just the latter
evident in Cook islands) in 30 seasons than Parvati (we also meet Ozzy, Penner,
and a worthy winner in Yul in a year the tribes were divided by race; “goddamit”
says Vince McMahon, “we can have a separate division just for the Mexicans?”)
Mania’s got one all time great match, Bret Hart beating
Steve Austin in a match where they flipped roles, and its the Real World where
we met CT, who would become a key building block of The Challenge, for which
Real World would eventually be seen as a developmental territory.
Fourteen
1.
Wrestlemania XIV (1998) 3 pts (28)
2.
Survivor Fiji (Winter, 2007) 2 pts (27)
3.
Real World San Diego (Spring, 2004) 1 pt (29)
Mania lacks the all time great match of the prior couple of
years, but does have Mike Tyson, a Cactus Jack/Terry Funk tag team, and Shawn
Michaels’s last match for several years, that garners it the win. Survivor’s
got a likeable winner in Earl, a likeable best player in Yau Man; and even with
future red carpet walker Jamie Chung (and alleged future A-Rod side piece
Robin) RW San Diego settles for third.
Fifteen
1.
Survivor China (Fall, 2007) 3 pts (30)
2.
Wrestlemania XV (1999) 2 pts (30)
3.
Real World Philadelphia (Winter, 2004-05) 1 pt
(30)
Mania’s a one match event, Steve Austin meeting the Rock,
and Philadelphia (which is also where Mania was held) for my money, is the
worst RW season of the first 15 as the franchise spends the past three cycles
clearly cowed by the pearl clutching reaction to the Vegas season (“two girls
in bed with one boy, oh my stars!”) The Chinese location helps Survivor, as
does the undeniable physical appeal of Amanda Kimmel, the snarkiness of winner
Todd Herzog and brute force of Gravedigger James. That sounds like a wrestling character, and
there was a wrestler, Ashley, who was an early elimination. Halfway through and we’ve got a three way
tie. Excitement! Who you got to take the whole thing? Who you got?
Who? You? Got?
Sixteen
1.
Survivor Micronesia (Spring, 2008) 3 pts (33)
2.
Wrestlemania 2000 (2000) 2 pts (32)
3.
Real World Austin (Fall, 2005) 1 pt (31)
Mania is fine; it features a terrific tag team collision
matchup of the Hardys v. The Dudleys v. Edge and Christian (more broken bodies in
those tag matches than any three Real Worlds put together) and a good, but too
short, match between Chris Benoit, Kurt Angle, and Chris Jericho. That’s enough to pull it ahead of a solid
Austin group (including two couples, Wes/Johanna and Melinda/Danny, both of
which are no more; 14 seasons later Wes is still running the Challenge, he’s
MTVs Triple H); but this is an easy first place call-- this is Survivor’s Fans
vs. Favorites year, bringing back Cirie, James, Amanda and an electric
performance from the winner Parvati.
Seventeen
1.
Wrestlemania X-7 (2001) 3 pts (35)
2.
Real World Key West (Spring, 2006) 2 pts (33)
3.
Survivor Gabon (Fall, 2008) 1 pt (34)
Maybe the greatest Wrestlemania ever including three 4 star
matches (a rematch of the tag from the year before, Angle against Benoit and
Rock vs. Austin). Real World escaped its post Vegas run of last place finishes
as both Johnny Bananas and Paula Walnuts came out of Key West. It’s a Survivor
season notable only for future celebrity rehabber Sugar Kiper and Corinne’s
willingness to bring the mean.
Eighteen
1.
Survivor Tocantins (Spring, 2009) 3 pts (37)
2.
Wrestlemania X8 (2002) 2 pts (37)
3.
Real World Denver (Winter, 2006-07) 1 pt (34)
Real World offers a really boring season in a really boring
city (shots fired!) to fall further behind while Wrestlemania didn’t bring much in
terms of match quality in its return to Toronto, but the intergenerational
meeting of Hulk Hogan and the Rock provided a talking point. Survivor was really flavorful, we met Coach,
Tyson, Stephen Fishbach and the winner JT
Nineteen
1.
Wrestlemania XIX (2003) 3 pts (40)
2.
Real World Sydney (Fall, 2007) 2 pts (36)
3.
Survivor Samoa (Fall, 2009) 1 pt (38)
Sydney was good, the best RW since Vegas, Trisha gets kicked
out for shoving Parisa; Cohutta and KellyAnne have a mismatched showmance, and
we meet probable sociopath Dunbar. But
it’s a tough year; Mania has two four star matches (Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar
nearly fighting to their mutual death, Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho) and
the end of Steve Austin’s career against the Rock. Survivor, even with the debut of the cyclonic
Russell Hantz can’t get out of third.
Twenty
1.
Wrestlemania XX (2004) 3 pts (43)
2.
Survivor Heroes vs. Villains (Spring, 2010) 2
pts (40)
3.
Real World Hollywood (Spring, 2008) 1 pt (37)
Look at this matchup.
Holy cats this is a good matchup. My favorite Wrestlemania moment, the
show closing event hug between Eddie Guerrero (who beat Kurt Angle in a four
star match) and Chris Benoit (who beat Shawn Michaels and Triple H in an even
better match) as it ratified a “workrate based” style of wrestling not often
privileged in WWE. I’m likely to pick Wrestlemania XX over the birth of your
children as an all time great moment. We
also have arguably the best Survivor season --vibrant all star characters (booked
in a babyfaces vs. heels format, just like Cowboy Bill Watts would have done) and
bold game play – Colby, Jerri, Coach, Boston Rob, all fill out the card
underneath Russell and Parvati’s main event work and the surprise of Sandra
becoming not only the game’s only two time winner, but probably the most
significant two time winner in US reality competition history. Hollywood’s pretty bad; Real World made a
permanent move to hour long episodes, many of which here centered around Joey’s
substance abuse. The non-Survivor body
count in this paragraph is high.
Twenty-one
1.
Wrestlemania XXI (2005) 3 pts (46)
2.
Real World Brooklyn (Winter, 2009) 2 pts (39)
3.
Survivor Nicaragua (Fall, 2010) 1 pt (41)
Mania hits a period where the top of the card is laden with
the promoter’s son in law and a children’s character whose first name onomatopoeically
rhymes with Yawn, but earlier in the night we saw the debut of a good gimmick,
“Money in the Bank” and just an all time great Shawn Michaels v. Kurt Angle
match; Brooklyn isn’t bad, although it centers around a real emotional
fragility of the housemates, there’s a struggling transgendered person, a struggling
abuse victim, a struggling veteran, a struggling dude with a bow tie. Here’s how bad Nicaragua (with multiple quits
and an all time bad winner) was, I forgot about it in my initial pass,
necessitating a feverish rework of these final ten rounds. Look at the lead Mania is building up!
20-19-58%5D.JPG)
Twenty-two
1.
Survivor Redemption Island (Spring, 2011) 3 pts
(44)
2.
Wrestlemania 22 (2006) 2 pts (48)
3.
Real World Cancun (Summer, 2009) (40)
A pretty mediocre lot here; Survivor looked to position the
show as a face off between Boston Rob and Russell, but the latter got bounced
early leaving the former for an easily dominant win. The Redemption Island gimmick, meaning that
eliminated competitors weren’t really eliminated, is the most easily despised
of all reality competition twists. No Last Chance Kitchen for me, thanks – if your
torch is snuffed, the next time I need to see you is the reunion.
Mania wasn’t great, but did have several good matches,
including Edge v. Mick Foley, that carved out a good show in spite of the main
event. Clearly, RW made the decision
that Brooklyn was a little heavy, as Cancun was maybe the emptiest season of RW
ever.
Twenty-three.
1.
Survivor South Pacific (Fall, 2011) 3 pts (47)
2.
Real World DC (Winter, 2010) 2 pts (42)
3.
Wrestlemania 23 (2007) 1 pt (49)
RW pivoted earnest again looking to capitalize on their
audience’s Obama propelled interest in politics (short form Obama review –
health care good, drones bad – if the Dow had grown to 18,000 and Bin Laden was
put in the ground during a GOP Presidency Fox News would call for a fifth head
on Mt. Rushmore) it only marginally worked (Emily and Ty had an interesting
showmance) but it beats out a Wrestlemania centered around the possibility of
Donald Trump losing his hair (which worked for box office, but involved Donald
Trump, as unpalatable a television personality that exists in the 21st
century); they both settle comfortably behind an interesting Survivor with
Cochran’s maneuvering, Ozzie’s cockiness, Russell’s nephew carrying on the
family name, and the winner, Sophie.
Twenty-four
1.
Real World New Orleans (Summer, 2010) 3 pts (45)
2.
Wrestlemania XXIV (2008) 2 pts (51)
3.
Survivor One World (Spring, 2012) 1 pt (48)
This is a tight round; New Orleans had a combustible group,
Preston battling Ryan, Knight showmancing Jemmye, Mckenzie always blacking
out. We’re entering a Bad Girls Club
universe now where the RW production company is about to really push the 7
strangers who live in a house envelope on a lower tier cable channel (to put
BGC in a Real World context, remember Julie asking Heather B if she was a drug
dealer during RW1? If that happened on Bad Girls Julie would have been
stretchered out of the house) You can see elements of that here as that RW
mixture of earnestness and exploitation tips toward the latter in a way that
made for good TV. Mania was also largely
good, again, built around a celebrity (Floyd Mayweather) and containing some
solid matches, including Ric Flair’s WWE retirement, Edge v. Undertaker in the
main event, and CM Punk winning Money in the Bank. Survivor was dominated by
Kim Spradlin, whose game was more methodically precise than entertaining.
Twenty-Five
1.
Real World Las Vegas (Spring, 2011) 3 pts (48)
2.
Survivor Philippines (Fall, 2012) 2 pts (50)
3.
Wrestlemania XXV (2009) 1 pt (52)
A super, super competitive silver anniversary round. Mania has a great (but a tick overrated, as
late period Undertaker tended to be) Undertaker/Shawn Michaels match and
another CM Punk Money in the Bank win, but suffers, again, from mediocre work
at the top of the card. Blair Freaking Warner
was on Survivor (and Jeff Kent, an all-time great second baseman, the return of
Penner, super charismatic Malcolm, but mainly…) Blair Warner was on
Survivor. But its Real World that hits
the casting jackpot again with megavolatile Adam and Dustin “Fratpad” Zito;
back to back Real World wins getting it back into the game with five seasons to
go while Survivor and Wrestlemania continue their battle for the lead.
Down. The Stretch. They. Come.
Twenty-Six
1.
Real World San Diego (Fall, 2011) 3 pts (51)
2.
Survivor Caramoan (Spring, 2013) 2 pts (52)
3.
Wrestlemania XXVI (2010) 1 pt (53)
It couldn’t be much closer, both this round and through 26
seasons. Wrestlemania’s still good,
putting a coat of paint on the previous year’s show with The Undertaker
retiring Shawn Michaels in the best match of the night; Survivor also played a
familiar tune and wasn’t bad, but having players so freshly removed from the
show like Malcolm, Phillip, an unhinged Brandon Hantz and Cochrane gave this
season a tick of a greatest hits vibe. RW found the right collision formula
again, with the right wing showmance between Zach and Ashley pitted against, sort of, gay
castmembers in Sam and (bisexual and maybe bipolar, Frank).
Twenty-seven
1.
Survivor Blood vs. Water (Fall, 2013) 3 pts (55)
2.
Wrestlemania XXVII (2011) 2 pts (55)
3.
Real World St. Thomas (Summer, 2012) 1 pt (52)
Even with a cast member named Latoya Jackson, the three year
RW run ends; sometimes the mix of people works, sometimes you get Brandon,
whose addiction issues were better suited for an episode of Intervention than
Real World. Same solid formula for Mania, with Triple H sliding into the role
of losing to the Undertaker (Real World had long since been eclipsed as MTV
flagship, first by the Hills, and now by Jersey Shore, and Snooki wrestled at
this Mania while the Miz was, sort of incredibly, in the main event). Survivor
continued its formula by bringing back more returnees, doing a couples twist
that included brothers Artis and Vytas, season two winner Tina and her
daughter, a Big Brother winner, Hayden (in the lower tier of American BB winners; he was on the friendly, as opposed to the strategic end of a dominant alliance...dammit, don't get me started on Big Brother) and Tyson, who dominated the game.
Twenty-eight
1.
Survivor Cagayan (Spring, 2014) 3 pts (58)
2.
Real World Portland (Spring, 2013) 2 pts (54)
3.
Wrestlemania XXVIII (2012) 2 pts (56)
This is a tight matchup; Survivor breaks format here, going
back to an all new cast and crushing it with a new breakout star, Tony, who
plays the game like his hair (such as it was) was on fire. Mania has a well worked version of its formula,
with CM Punk v. Chris Jericho eclipsing both the Undertaker v. Triple H rematch
and the return of The Rock, meeting Yawn, er, John Cena. Real World responds to its declining ratings
by taking nearly a year between seasons 27 and 28 and returns with a strong
effort; a good showmance between Johnny and Averey, bisexual football player
Marlon and one handed egomaniac Jordan, and Hurricane Nia, who got into maybe
the biggest fight in RW history and suggested putting a hit out on her
castmates.
Only two seasons left.
Twenty-nine
1.
Real World Ex-Plosion (Spring, 2014) 3 pts (57)
2.
Wrestlemania 29 (2013) 2 pts (58)
3.
Survivor San Juan del Sur (Fall, 2014) 1 pt (59)
Real World gets the nod here; it takes another near year off
and retools, breaking the wall between cast and production as a regular matter
of course and introducing a twist where the ex partners of the cast move into
the house. Mania does what it does, Punk
moves into the lose to Undertaker role, Cena and the Rock meet again, Brock
Lesnar returns from UFC to face Triple H. An
okayish Survivor season, they go back to the Blood vs. Water gimmick a little
quickly, and one half of a team who competed on the Amazing Race comes out on
top. Survivor and Wrestlemania separated
by a point, Real World right behind….lets get to…
The thrilling conclusion.
Thirty
1.
Wrestlemania XXX (2014) 3 pts (61)
2.
Real World Skeletons (Spring, 2015) 1.5 pts (58.5)
3.
Survivor Worlds Apart (Spring, 2015) 1.5 pts
(60.5)
And so it ends. But
in true wrestling booking, we have a disputed finish.
At the time of this writing, RW is nearing the end of the season;
it continued with the previous year’s formula of a wild twist, this time with
the “skeletons” that cast members had in their closets; I’m awarding a
provisional tie between it and Survivor, which has just begun its season with a
pretty good amount of hype for its cast.
At season’s end, that half point will either be awarded to one of those
two shows. If Survivor can get that half point, it pulls into a first place tie
and then, perhaps we go five more minutes, or go to a special judges panel, or the next Survivor season and Wrestlemania 31 are locked inside of a 15 foot high steel cage! Two enter - only one survives (snort)!
Mania’s going to get the win here for the final round, the
big, big win as this Mania includes maybe the biggest surprise in Wrestlemania
history, Brock Lesnar beating the Undertaker, and one of the great moments in all
of wrestling, Daniel Bryan (probably the best North American wrestler of the 21st
century) capturing the WWE Championship in the main event.
By the narrowest of margins and on the back of Daniel Bryan
– it’s Wrestlemania (Yes! Yes! Yes!) which wins our Triple Threat Match, by a
half point over Survivor…unless this turns out to be a Dusty finish…
Tune in for the next battle, 118 elements in the periodic table
vs. 118 seasons of Australian Rules Football.
See you then!
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